Sadness...

This morning, the former president of South Korea committed suicide by jumping off of a cliff in the middle of a hiking trail.  He was under a lot of pressure due to his bribery scandal for accepting more than $6M during his presidency.

I don't remember hearing a lot about suicides in Canada when I was living there, but I hear a lot about suicides here in Korea.  Not only are there frequent high-profile suicides, such as celebrities, conglomerate executives, politicians, there are way too many suicides among regular people, such as office workers, housewives and especially students.

#1 cause of death among Koreans in their 20's is suicide (#5 cause among all Koreans).  According to Wikipedia, Korea is #11 in the world for suicide rate @ 22 out of 100,000 people per year (#2 in the world for female suicides).

There are even websites and online "cafes" where people meet up to commit suicide together.  In the past few weeks, there was also a flurry of group suicides where they used charcoal burners in sealed rooms or cars which was a method used by a celebrity recently.  

There are a lot of suicides in the US, I know...I've heard of mass suicides often related to cult activities or some dumb kids committing suicides on live webcams.  But I hear of suicides way too often here to wonder why it is as such.  It may be due to the high level of overall stress.. or high levels of crime such as scam, fraud, corruption, etc... or perhaps it's the culture.  From the outside, one may see rapid technological advancements, great production capacity, tremendous national pride, etc.... but inside, Korea still seems to be a country suffering from a poor quality of life which may be a reason I never feel at ease.

Konglish Lesson #12

Konglish of the day: 3D (pronounced "Seu-ree-dee")

Stands for 3D: Difficult, Dangerous, Dirty.. Sometimes Demeaning or Demanding can replace one of the D's.  I believe this came from Japan, but Koreans refer to some diffcult jobs or tasks as "3D".

"My job is so 3D, but I have nowhere else to go..."

"I realize what I'm asking you to do is 3D, but it'll be worth it at the end."

"Your face is 3D!"

What's wrong with your voice?

There's a phenomenon in Korea called "aegyo".  Which can be dscribed as "acting cute".  Actually, I'm not sure if people outside of Korea would call it "acting cute".

Aegyos are performed using extremely whiny voice and prolonging the ends of their sentences.. also, sometimes the speech is gibberish like baby talk and accompanied by physical clinginess.  Both guys and girls do aegyos to try and appear cute so that they can get something they want from somebody of the other sex or somebody older.

Some guys just die seeing some girls do aegyos.  Especially when the girls call them "oppa", which means "big brother".  I'm not a fan of aegyos.  I find it annoying.  It CAN be cute.. if a cute girl does it.  It is NOT cute if a guy does it.. nor is it cute when a girl whose image does not fit "cute" does it.  It makes me cringe when I see a girl who makes those squeaky whiny voices and thinks it's actually cute.

People not familiar with Korean culture or some other Asian cultures will have very little idea what I'm talking about.  I myself haven't really experienced it firsthand until I got here.

I think they oughta restrict people from doing aegyos.  They should only license those who are qualified to do aegyos... cute girls, kids ages 7 and down.

Umm... no.  Don't make me poke your eyes out.

Konglish Lesson #11

Konglish of the day: handphone (pronounced "hen-deuh-pone")

Koreans have a Korean word for a cellphone, but they thought it would be better use an English word... well.. a word they thought was English.

"I have the coolest handphone around."

"Where did I put my handphone?"

"You should not be talking on your handphone while you're driving."

I'd like free smiles please...

Shortly after I arrived in Korea the first time, I was very surprised with the level of service offered in Korean establishments.  Wherever I went, the service provided by most employees was top-notch.

One time at a family restaurant, I was enjoying some pasta with a cup of cola.  I was taking my time with my drink when the waitress lady took my half-full (or half-empty, whatever) cup and started walking away.  I yelled after her telling her that I wasn't done with my drink then she told she was refiling it.  When she returned with a full cup, I asked her why she was refilling it at half-full.  She told me it was because the ice had melted and watered down the drink.  I was actually shocked by the level of consideration which was totally unnecessary, in my opinion.  Some places have servers crouch down next to tables to make sure their eye levels are below yours.

Same level of service quality can be witnessed in hair salons... not even posh hair salons.  Even regular hair salons bring you drinks and wash your hair before and after a simple haircut.  Some places even take some time to massage your scalp for a few minutes as they wash your hair.  All for like half the cost of hair cuts I used to get back in Toronto.

The fact that there is no tipping culture in Korea makes it even more remarkable.

All of this service provided at no tips (most of these part-time jobs pay around 4000 won per hour... about US$3 now) makes you wonder how difficult it is to make a few bucks in Korea.  It IS probably the only way to survive in this competitive environment.

Not only will we  give you a free smile, we'll pamper you so much that you yourself will die from oversmileage.

What happened to letting the machine get it?

Koreans do not use voicemail.

Maybe the technology in Korea skipped voicemail altogether, but Koreans almost never use it.

When I was in Canada, everybody used voicemail.. or an answering machine.. at home, at work and on your mobile.  One of the first things you do when you start new work is recording your voicemail greeting.

I've never reached a voicemail system or an answering machine whenever I called a landline phone in Korea.

Throughout the four years I've been in Korea, I've had maybe 4 people leave voicemail on my mobile.  Most of the time, people call cell phones and when it's unanswered, they hang up and either assume they'll get return calls thanks to caller IDs and/or they send a text message.

Even though I work for a company that MAKES phone systems, I have no voicemail at work.  I wanted voicemail, they wouldn't give it to me... they disabled the feature on the company phone system.

If I call a co-worker, somebody else answers if the person I'm calling is not there.  I don't want to talk to somebody else... I want to talk to a freakin' machine.  Instead of leaving my mesasge on a reliable recording medium, I have to rely on some stranger who may or may not deliver my message properly.  Likewise, I do not like relying on my co-workers to answer my missed calls.   And I really don't like answering somebody else's phone either.. but people don't hang up even though they know they're not gonna get the machine.  You have to "pull" and answer your co-worker's phone call from your desk.

Back in North America, receiving mobile calls also costs you airtime, so you don't give out your cell numbers that readily for work purposes.  People are also reluctant to call mobiles unless it's absolutely necessary.  In Korea, however, your mobile number has to be available to everyone at work and people call eachother willy-nilly whenever.  So if you don't pick up your phone at your desk, they call your cell phone... or they just don't bother with your landline and call your cell right away.

So it may be that the voicemail had been a victim of the rapid introduction of cell phones and text messages, but why are Koreans afraid of talking to the machine?

Answering machine... how I miss thee...

Why oh why?

I went to a Kraze Burger for the first time tonight.  It's a Korea-based burger franchise.

I ordered the KO Burger because it sounded delicious with its beef patty, bacon, swiss cheese and jalapeno peppers...

When I got the burger, it was cut in half and it had two plastic sword things sticking out like they do with club sandwiches.  The taste was alright...but throughout the meal, I couldn't get my head wrapped around the concept of eating a cut burger.  Eating a burger cut in half is a no-no in my burger world.

Who cuts burgers?  The fuck.

Won't anybody think of the children?!

Konglish Lesson #10

Konglish of the day: glamour (pronounced "geullehmuh")

If you're a girl new to the Korean culture and somebody used this word to describe you, then that person was admiring the size of your jugs.  Koreans use this word to mean "voluptuous"... perhaps the word "voluptuous" is especially hard for Koreans to pronounce.  Koreans might mistake Glamour magazine for an adult magazine...

"I wanna be glamour like those other girls."

"I don't know about her face.. but I like glamour style girls."

"Dude, you're getting fat.. and getting man-boobs.  Almost glamour... you should wear the manzier."

Konglish Lesson #9

Konglish of the day: 1+1 (pronounced "one pluh-seuh one")

You can often find "1+1" in supermarkets or stores as promotional methods.  It means "2-for-1" as in 2 for the price of 1.  I don't know why Koreans decided to popularize "1 + 1" while "2-for-1" is just as catchy and easy for Koreans to use.

There was a time at work when there was a disagreement between an American supplier and a Korean co-worker on the price of an item.  The price was quoted by the supplier as being "$x plus tax".  In North America, that means x does not include tax and you must add tax to get total price.  This Korean co-worker misunderstood and argued that x is the price that we had to pay.  That's fine.  He's entitled to misunderstanding.  However, he was very adamant in his statement that he was right and the supplier was wrong... and he used the argument that tax is included in "x + tax" because "1 + 1" means you get 2 for the price of 1.

"I decided to buy this milk because of 1+1."

"You want me there on your so-gae-ting?  Oh!  I'll bring another girl to even up the numbers, but then since she's also single, it'll be 1+1 for you!"

"Instead of buying separate snacks, let's get this sandwich and share.  It's on 1+1."

Marriage - Part Two

In this post, I will talk a little bit about marriage gifts before going into marrying "elites" in Korea.

In Korea, marriage is more of a union of families than a union of two people.  There's a lot of process involved in marrying families, it seems.  Korean families make material preparations and exchange marriage "goods" when their children get married.  Many cultures have something similar, I'm sure, but the Korean way is way too complex for me to understand the details.  Simply put, groom's family prepares the home for the couple to live in, the bride's family fills the home with furnishings and the families exchange cash, jewellery, silken goods and other "marriage" items.  Families come to agreements on these items before the couple marries.  I can't imagine the parents sitting down and negotiate on them. 

When I was working in the patent department of our company, I've been told that I should study and take the patent bar to become a patent lawyer... so that I can marry well.  I like the idea of "marrying well" (whatever that means), but I'm not gonna take the wrong career path for me to do so.  "Patent lawyer" in Korean is "byeollisa".  In Korea, some of the top professions end in a single Korean letter pronounced "sa".  Doctor - Euisa.  Lawyer - Byunhosa.  Judge - Pahnsa.  If a girl wants to get married to a "sa", she needs to be hot, for one, and her parents have to fork up a lot money.  Usually, the parents of the girl has to pay for the couple's house, a doctor's office and car for the son and buy loads of shit for the groom's family.  I've heard of marriages become unrealized solely because the guy's parents demanded too much materialistic goods from the girl's family and the girl's parents couldn't afford it or refused.

The way I see it, the parents of the "sa" is SELLING their son, trying to get some return on their investment.  It's sad, in my point-of-view, but some say it makes sense.  It's even sadder than some families willingly pay up that much money and send their daughters off thinking that they've gotten a good deal.

"sa" is definitely in high demand among women but there are also professions for women that men prefers.  Teachers are popular because the profession is directly related to the education of children.  Flight attendants are also very popular, because I think the women have to be physically attractive to start with and the profession demands high quality of service which husbands desire from their wife-to-be's.

Some professions rise to the status of "elites" if they ride the trends to be come popular.  In the recent years, fund managers were in top demand because they became lucrative careers during the economic rise after early 2000s, but I'm sure that that popularity took a massive hit due to the global financial crisis.

Marriage - Part One

Marriage is a major topic that offers the most variation across different cultures... and across generations.

Some marriage cultural aspects in Korea haven't changed much over the years so I will post about them here.  Although I haven't seen many people get married while I was living in Canada, I know enough to realize what is distinctly Korean in Korean marriages.  This post will focus on the topic of people choosing their marriage partners.

Koreans talk about "conditions" or "qualifications" of somebody they plan to marry.  It's not so much the "standards" that I'm used to hearing back in Canada... I call them "qualifications" because that's what they are, to me at least.  In North America, in general, I think one dates another of his/her sexual orientation then determines whether he/she can get married to the person after a long while of getting to know the person.  In Korea, people simply have a set of qualifications they almost adhere to before they even date somebody seriously.  

A woman will have the following set of "conditions" for her marriage-material dude (in order of priority from my perspectives):

1. Job/career - Profession and/or minimum salary is a good metric

2. Education - I've already touched upon on this topic, but the guy's school shouldn't rank too low

3. Parents' current/past career - Read as "Potential need to financially support parents and/or future inheritance"

4. Personality - This is not a simple fact on a profile sheet, but personalities shouldn't clash too much

5. Siblings - Simply put, is the guy the eldest son who has to put up his parents?  Will his sisters play the evil step-sister roles?

6. Physical appearance - Guys should look presentable enough

7. Hometown - Certain regions of Korea suffer from bad reps

A guy will have the following set of "conditions":

1. Physical appearance - #1 priority to aim for that trophy wife

2. Personality - Again, not measurable but men prefers "wife" material (supportive)

3. Education - Notice how big of a role this has?

4. Parents' current/past career - Same reason as above

5. Job/career - Not very important, but some professions are preferred above others.

6. Hometown - Same reason as above

There is definite credibility to the priorities I placed on those conditions above... since the marriage match-makers in Korea uses similar priorities.  I've been told that for men, it's physical hotness; for women, it's money.  Matchmakers apparently use a score-based ranking system and they match people of similar "rankings".  I get -5 points for being the eldest.  Hot girls get matched up with doctors and lawyers.  You know what else is interesting?  Some matchmakers employ "elite" singles to match up with their clients...to just go on single "dates".  Seems like a Disney version of pimping to me.

Parents play major roles when it comes to their children choosing their marriage partners.  Korean parents usually have to approve/disapprove of their in-laws (both the soon-to-be-weds as well as the parents) and parents of both parties have to come to agreement.  There's even a term for the first meeting among the parents:  "sangyeolleh" which, according to the dictionary, means "the formal bows between the bride and the groom".  My mom, for example, has her own set of "conditions" for my wife-to-be.  Unfortunately, I think there are maybe 3 girls in all of Korea that fits her bill... and I haven't met any of them yet... and I'm not holding my breath.

Koreans claim that people have better lives when the marriages are done between a couple that meet each other's "conditions".  Then how come Korea has one of the highest (definitely top 3) divorce rates in the world?

Konglish Lesson #8

Konglish of the day: apart (pronounced "ah-pah-teuh")

It does not mean 'apart' as in 'separate', but rather it's short for 'apartment'.  An apart is pretty much the ultimate dwelling for someone living in a Korean city.  Most aparts are part of huge apartment complexes, some as large as 40~50 buildings strong.

Another related Konglish: condo (pronounced "cone-do")

Condo is short for 'condominium', but the concept for a condo is different in Korea.  Koreans usually refers to condo resorts as 'condos'...like a ski or beach resort.  So if you tell a Korean that you live in a 'condo' in Toronto, you'll confuse the hell out of the person.

Yet another related Konglish: pension (pronounced like it's written "pension")

If I'm new to this culture, I would have had no idea why 'pension' would be a related word in this post.  Pensions are small remote bed-and-breakfast-type lodgings in Korea.  After a little research, I found out that 'pension' is used in Europe to describe small hotels usually operated retired pensioners.

One more related Konglish: officetel (pronounced "oh-peace-tel")

A merging of the words 'office' and 'hotel'.  I live in one of these:  A single building that houses studio-like apartments where each unit can be used for either businesses or residences.  My officetel is actually a pseudo-loft; it has a second floor but it is only 3 feet high.  Modern officetels usually come with some appliances integrated into the interior (aka "built-in" another Konglish).

Final related Konglish: oneroom (prounced "one-loom")

A studio apartment of lower quality than officetels.  Onerooms often invoke images of poverty as I've gotten looks of sympathy when I once mentioned that I might be shopping around for a oneroom.

The IT Heaven

Under several different metrics, Korea is considered one of the most technologically advanced countries in the world in terms of IT (Information Technology).  Not only is advanced technology available, a lot of people use it regularly.

Some facts:

Something like 91% of all homes have broadband internet.

Two of the top electronics manufacturers are based in Korea. 

First country to have mobile digital television as mass market success.

A typical person may have up to 6 different ways to pay for his/her coffee at Starbucks (via credit card swipe, cash, credit card RFID, mobile phone RFID, mobile phone barcode, transit card)

There's 1 GPS navigation system in usage for every 4 cars in Korea.

I pay 30 bucks a month for 100Mbps broadband internet line.

I just did an online internet speed test and it read 12MegaBYTES per second as my download speed within Korea... that means my Ethernet LAN card might be the bottleneck now..

A scenario:

I can send 5 bucks I owe to my friend to his bank account, pay last month's hydro bill, buy 10 stock shares of Samsung, buy tickets to a movie later in the evening, then watch a live televised baseball game... all on my mobile phone...without making an actual phone call... while taking a dump in the subway washroom.  This scenario is not impossible in the US.. but very difficult and very expensive and only possible by the most tech-savvy people.

Possible explanations:

I work in the telecom industry here in Korea, so I think I have some qualifications to state my opinions regarding why technology gets adopted faster and more easily in Korea.  Many industries in Korea are pushing the boundaries of IT, such as commerce, banking, entertainment.  The government is always pushing the IT industry, telling companies to deploy bigger, faster, better networks.  Accessbility due to high density of population helps fuel technology trends.  Patience is not a virtue in Korea where people always want everything faster and quicker.  Inferiority complex formed by being next to Japan forced Koreans to make and buy better gadgets.  Koreans are fascinated with things that flash and beep.  4 out of 5 dentists in Korea recommend people to surf the internet for 3 hours a day.

OK.  Maybe the last few points aren't exactly true...

I like technology myself, so it's convenient to be living in the center of it all.  I just wish it was more advanced so that robots one day will wash and fold my clothes.

This mysterious so-called Lucky Cream stands for the "L" in LG.