Blind Dates

Koreans have "ting" terminologies (derived from the word "meeting") which they use for the different ways they meet people of the opposite sex.  I will go into more detail in a later post, but I will explain one of the "ting"s: "so-gae-ting" where "so-gae" is Korean word for "introduction".  It's basically where you meet somebody through an introduction, but very often the two of you meet by yourselves without the middle person.  In other words, a blind date.

Unless I'm wrong, blind dates are somewhat of a taboo back in NA.  Back in Canada, I only went on one blind date... and it was with a Korean girl... (didn't work out).  I've never heard of a couple getting hooked up through a blind date nor have I seen any friends hook each other up on blind dates.  I think people preferred to take the risk of running into a 50-year old hairy virgins on online dating sites over getting set up on blind dates.

I've been in Korea for 3.5 years and I went out on more than 20 so-gae-tings... 10 of which were during the second half of last year.  That is not considered unusual for somebody my age in Korea.  I don't really go around begging people to set me up, but I don't refuse when I get offers.  I've built a repertoire of first blind date topics that I can discuss as ice-breakers.  Like most blind date veterans, I have a routine.  Start talking about the circumstances on which the blind date was set up... and talk about the people who set you up and your relationship to those people... that's between 15 to 30 minutes.  Then talk about basic profile facts... name (you'd be surprised how often this is not a given prior to meeting face-to-face), age (important in Korea), family, work, school majors...  By this time, the dinner/lunch (which I always pay for) would be over and we'd move over to a coffee shop or a bar depending on the location and time of day.  Then I talk about how I'm Canadian and I have moved here 3 years ago.. this always has a follow-up question as to why I came here.  After that, topics become more fluid and I'd ask first-date questions: "What are your hobbies?" "What's your favourite movie?" "Have you traveled anywhere?" "Where is the favourite place you visited?" After an hour or so of that BS, I make a decision call at that point...  I try and make effort to make more interesting conversations if I'm interested in the girl.. or I make an excuse to get out of there if I find the girl too annoying / ugly / fat / old / boring / dumb / conservative / crazy / clingy / whiny / sensitive / snobby / bitchy / skanky.  Also, if I ain't interested, I let her get up first and I walk behind her so that she reaches the counter first in order to make her feel inclined to pay for the coffee/drink.  Costs associated with these random blind dates add up quite a bit.

It's not awkward...